


after all, you were born to fly

by jiayou



Category: NINE PERCENT (Band), 偶像练习生 | Idol Producer (TV)
Genre: M/M, Magical Realism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-11
Updated: 2018-06-25
Packaged: 2019-05-05 07:33:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14612904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jiayou/pseuds/jiayou
Summary: Xukun goes back to his grandmother's home in Zhejiang for the first time in three years.





	1. chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> write the fics u want to read, they said. itll be easy, they said. anyway nobody said that but me & if i have to raise the cliche magical realism trope for ip from the dead with my own two hands.... so be it!

“A bond between souls is ancient – older than the planet.”

 

 

 

  
It’s the summer after eleventh grade when Xukun goes back to his grandmother’s house.

He hadn’t been in a few years. In addition to his quickly tightening schedule, his mother had wanted him to take extra classes to cram as much information as they possibly could inside his mind before school started again. So he had signed up for chemistry, physics, math classes...

He needs to go back, his father had argued.

“His studies,” had been his mother’s only reply. “Xukun can wait until after high school to visit.”

His father sighed deeply. “He hasn’t in two years,” he said, starting slowly, “And you know my mother’s condition. If he doesn’t go now, I don’t know if he will be able to... after high school ends”

...

“Fine,” his mother relented. “But only for a month. And more studying when he gets back.”

Xukun, listening to his parents in his room, closed his eyes. It looked like he was going back to Zhejiang.

  
——

  
Zhejiang was hot.

It was also slightly humid, but in the worst way. Xukun could already feel himself sweating through his T-shirt. He stood next to the Taxi as the driver unloaded his luggage.

“Thanks,” Xukun said. The taxi driver nodded at him, before driving off the way it came.

Xukun looked at the dusty road in front of him. Off to the side, he saw a cluster of pink camellias. They looked fresh and dewy, with the tiny water droplets one might expect from a cold spring morning.

_Odd,_ Xukun thought. Didn’t camellias usually bloom in the early spring?

“Xukun!” A voice cut off his thoughts. “You’re here! Welcome.”

Turning his back to the camellias, Xukun couldn’t help but smile.

“Grandmother!” He rushed over to stop her from walking any farther. “Why are you here? I could have made it to your house.”

She harrumphed. “I might be old, but I’m not too old to make the walk to the front gates to see my only grandchild. Did you know, Xukun, in the two years you haven’t been here, this new tea shop opened, and the owner’s son is very adorable. We’ve talked! I go there quite often, actually. There tea is really good, Xukun, you would probably like it. I can show you some of the tea I've bought from them when we get back home. There's one kind that I really like, because it's sweet, but not too sweet, you know? Oh, I'm so excited you're here, Xukun! Let's go to the tea shop soon. So much has changed! Time really does fly by. Anyway, you can meet the owner's son that I was talking about when we go tomorrow...”

It was nice to be back, Xukun thought. He pulled his suitcase along with him as his grandmother started walking back. Even though she would doubtlessly try to introduce him to this new boy in town, he couldn’t help but admit that he had missed his grandmother. Her voice reminded him of all the summers he had spent hear as a kid, and soothed over his thoughts like a lullaby.

"-so I said, of course! We'll come by soon." His grandmother paused. "Xukun, you're not listening to me, are you?"

Xukun blinked abashedly. "Sorry, grandmother," he said. "I was just thinking about how nice it is to be back."

She smiled at him. "It's alright," she said. "Your head has always been in the clouds. Just like your grandfather."

  
——

  
When Xukun steps in his grandmother's house, he's surprised at how similar it is to the last time he visited. The house is filled with plants, as per usual, and if he breathes deeply, he can smell some type of flower blooming - maybe it's the one on the windowsill.

"Your room is right there, like always," his grandmother says while bustling around to get him some slippers. "I've told Mr. Li I won't be going in today to the flowershop - he knows you're arriving today."

She stops in front of him, triumphantly holding a pair of slippers. "I knew they were here somewhere," she says, dropping them at his feet. "If you'll just get settled, I can cut some peaches for you."

Xukun obediently takes his shoes off, and puts the slippers on. Just as he's about to move his luggage into his room -

"Hua'er!" Xukun exclaims with delight, picking her off from the ground. "And what might you be doing here?"

The cat meows, disgruntled.

"Do you think she remembers me?" Xukun muses. "I've always treated you best, Hua'er," he continues. "Isn't that right? You remember me - Xukun?"

His grandmother watches amusedly. "You've always spoiled her so," she says. "After you left last time she refused to catch her own food to eat for a month. A whole month! All because you couldn't help yourself from feeding her whenever she looked at you with those large eyes of hers."

Xukun pets Hua'er contentedly, as she begins to pur. She bats his shoulder, but when he kisses the top of her head, her soft paws scrabble at his shirt for only a few seconds more before she settles, pleased, into his arms.

Xukun beams. "She still remembers me, I know it," he says. "I love you too, Hua'er. Let's go unpack together!"

  
——

  
After Xukun finishes unpacking, he sets Hua'er down on his bed to go eat some peaches. Several peaches and a full stomach later, he re-enters his room. It is only then that he spots another pot of - are those camellias? - on his windowsill.

"Grandmother," he calls. "When did you get these?"

She comes in, eyes landing on the camellias. "Oh those?" She asked. "They're new! It was a gift from the gods." She smiled mischeviously.

Xukun raises his eyebrows. "From the gods," he repeats. "I guess that explains why they're flowering in the summer then. I saw some at the village gate too, Grandmother."

She laughs and pats him on the back. "At the village gate?" She repeated. "So many camellias flowering in the summer? That means we'll have a lucky harvesting season, if the gods are blessing us so."

"And the scent," Xukun remarked. "I thought camellias had none."

"Like I said, they were god-given." His grandmother wiggles her eyebrows, before breaking out into laughter. "I'm just kidding, Xukun. I picked them from the forest last spring, and they've just bloomed ever since. You and I both know the forest is magical, thanks to the gods of the mountains. The camellias are beautiful though, aren't they?"

Xukun sighed. The magical mountain gods had been a myth his grandfather used to tell him all the time, as a bedtime story when he was much, much younger

"Alright, I won't keep your time," his grandmother said. "I know you're dying to explore the forest. A real man of nature, you are. Just like your grandfather." She smiled wistfully. "Be back before dinnertime!"

She left his room, slipping the door shut behind her.

Xukun looked at the the camellias before looking at Hua'er. His grandmother hadn't been wrong. He  _was_ itching to explore the forest again.

"I'll see you later," he said to Hua'er. "Have a nice nap!"

She rolled onto her side ungracefully, flopping across his pillow.

A smile curved at his lips. _I've missed this,_ he thought. Then he turned to unlatch the window. Taking care not to knock over the camellias, he deftly jumped out into his grandmother's garden and started walking towards the forest.

  
——

  
Deep in the forest, two eyes blinked open.

_It's him,_  he thought.  _He's finally returned._


	2. Chapter 2

It's late afternoon by the time Xukun stops to rest.

He'd walked around the edges of the forest for a good half hour, a little frightened by its newness. Before his family moved to Beijing, he had visited the forest almost daily. It used to be his second home, he mused, if not his first. His grandfather had taught him how to walk on the gently sloping paths of the forest. He vividly remembered teetering precariously on the forest's ground, before falling face-first into the dirt and wailing loudly. The forest had been kind to him, he recalled with a smile, always blooming brilliantly in the spring and leading him to beautiful clusters of flowers, small droplets of color in delicate, light tufts. He had picked them, then, and given them as gifts to his grandmother after he finished playing in the forest that day. He only ever took a few though, and never more than a handful, conscientious and grateful of the forest's generosity.

In the summer, the trees would bear their heavy, rich fruit to him. The usually shy leaves would unfurl under his touch, revealing fresh, ripe peaches that were tart and sweet, and the glossy red sheen of cherries on trees deeper in the forest. He had chased the squirrels and foxes around and away and up the trees until he was breathless, before settling with a huff on some of the trees' wider, flatter branches. He had dozed off with the sleepy warmth of the afternoon sun, waking with the sound of the wind rustling through the leaves to remind him to return home before the sun set.

And there were nights in the forest too, with fireflies flitting around, with shadows and cherry blossoms dancing on the ground, with the heavy, charged atmosphere of thunder and storms and rain, only to dissipate by sunrise as the molten gold rays of the sun crept silently across the earth, seeping into the crevices of the ground.

Remembering all of this with a wistful smile, Xukun had stopped lingering around the outskirts of the forest and finally, finally stepped in. Pushing the brambles aside of the south entrance to the forest, he had stepped in gingerly. There was a slight dip of the ground on the forest floor, evidently caused by the familiar visits of one or many individuals. Wondering who could have visited so often to cause the well-worn tread, Xukun followed the path down.

Xukun had been on the path for half an hour when he discovered, with delight, a family of robins perched on a small, unassuming tree, hidden from the main path. Pausing on his journey to refamiliarize himself with every inch of the forest, he stopped below the tree to observe.

There were two robins, both with peach-toned underbellies and dark blue-black feathers that shone luminously in the sunlight. Their pelt was iridescent under the strong light of summer; their tail feathers were white and reflected patches of light when they hopped and flew around.

They were young robins. Xukun would have thought they were nursing their own young if it were not for both of their brilliant plumage makign it starkly obvious that both were male.

Xukun made a mental note to bring pencil and paper the next time he came to sketch the robins with. Their colors were truly something he had never seen before.

_...well, with one exception._

There was...one creature he knew of that was even more breathtakingly vivid.

But that was years ago, and Xukun knew better than anyone that time moved differently in the forest. He had only been gone for three years, but three years was enough time for four or five generations of flowers to bloom and wither. Three years saw the change in Xukun from a young boy brimming with excitement to be entering high school to a quieter, more solemn one. The years hadn't jaded him, but rather tempered his once-reckless personality. Standing in the forest now wasn't the fearless boy of fifteen, but one that was celebrating his eighteenth birthday - his formal and sudden entry into adult - in just a few weeks.

Yes, three years might as well have been a thousand lifetimes in the forest. Now, more acutely than ever, Xukun felt the yawning gap between he and what once was.

Xukun shook his head, dispelling any lingering remnants of the past - the flash of a smile, the soft warmth of another.

Three years had certainly been enough for two new robins to make their home in the forest, Xukun thought wryly. And if they could start anew, why couldn't he?

He looked back up towards the robins. Then he turned decisively back towards his previous path.

After he turned, the robins took off abruptly.

  
——

  
Justin and Chengcheng crashed into each other (and quite a few branches) during their rapid descent to the ground. As their tails melted into two legs and their feathers into cloth, they tripped over each other, both neglecting breathing to speak as fast as possible.

"Did you see—"

"We just saw—"

"By the fifth tree"

"Right from the second river—"

"It was him—"

"He came back—"

"After three years—"

"Freaking finally—"

"Enough," Yanjun said, turning around. He sighed. "What did I tell you about cursing?"

Justin yelped indignantly. "That's why I said freaking, and not fu—"

A dirty look from Yanjun was enough to stop his next word.

"Fine," Justin huffed. "But I'm not that young anymore! I'm almost sixty!"

Yanjun sighed. "And you have forty more years to go before you can even think about being an adult, okay?" He ruffled Justin's hair, picking out a few stray twigs that had gotten caught on his flight back.

Chengcheng flopped onto the mossy ground of Yanjun's den. "This is boring," he announced. "I thought Zhengting would be here. Where is he?"

"Probably out doing whatever godly duties he has," Justin rolled his eyes, collapsing next to Chengcheng. "Which is totally ridiculous, by the way. After His Highness Zhang retired, like, five years ago, Zhengting worked all day every day to make sure everything was perfect."

"I know!" Chengcheng exclaimed. "Now we've finally convinced him to dial it down to twenty-three hours a day instead of twenty-four, and he's nowhere to be found at this incredibly exciting—"

"You could even say life-changing—"

"Moment."

Justin and Chengcheng looked to each other before coming to some invisible agreement, nodding.

Yanjun saw the devious gleams in their eyes and shook his head.

"You are not going out and finding Zhengting," he said, exasperated. "Don't even start thinking about it."

"But Yanjun—"

"That's not fair—"

Yanjun closed the entrance to his den with a wave of his hand. "Absolutely not," he said firmly. "Let them come together by themselves. No meddling this time around — or have you forgotten what you did last time?"

Justin and Chengcheng deflated.

"Fine," Chengcheng said begrudgingly. "But if they don't get together before the next full moon, I call dibs on locking them in your den, Yanjun, until they work things out."

Yanjun took a long, hard look at Chengcheng. Chengcheng looked long and hard back.

Yanjun rolled his eyes. "Don't think I've fallen for your wordplay, kids," he said, shaking his head. "I know the full moon is tonight," he said.

"But—" Justin interrupted.

"Let me finish," Yanjun said. "I know you're worried. I know Zhengting missed Xukun, and I know you want to help because you've seen how lonely he's been." He sighed. "I've noticed it too. Everyone has. But that doesn't give us the right to force anything right now."

Chengcheng sighed. "I know you're right," he said. "It's just hard when it's so obvious to everyone but them how much they both love each other. I don't know if I can stand another three years of Zhengting just pining."

It was silent for another few seconds.

"Well," Yanjun said. "If I know Zhengting like I do, he's probably just waiting to make some big, dramatic entrance. You really probably won't have to wait three years. In fact..."

He trailed off, before he smiled, eyes gleaming.

"We might not even have to wait until tonight."

  
——

  
In the middle of the forest was a giant tree. It rose into the clouds, its branches stretching far above the earth. It was so large that many winged creatures elected to bury their nests in between various higher-up layers of the wood and leaves, as the density of the branches offered shelter from the sweltering heat of the sun during the summer season, and filtered in enough light and warmth during the winter. Even wingless creatures would house their coves and burrows in the between the trunk and branches, as the sheer height of the tree offered protection from any foreigners that might happen across the tree.

Not that it was easy to find, Xukun thought offhandedly. The forest's center was guarded fiercely with many, many detours that would result in anyone looking for the middle of the forest to stumble around in circles, lost, before somehow exiting the forest from the same place they entered. Not to mention that the forest could grow exponentially once one became lost in it — those who entered the forest with dishonest intentions could be stranded in it for weeks, wading through thickly padded swamps of vine and brambles before eventually running out of effort and energy, felled by the sheer size of the forest.

Nobody could just stumble upon the center of the forest. Someone that knew the path must lead the way.

Xukun's grandfather had taught him, when he was much younger: which trees to look for, which flowers to indicate that he was going in the wrong direction. Most importantly, his grandfather had told him solemnly, were his intentions. Anyone that did not have a pure heart would never find the middle of the forest. They would fall off the right path, misled by the crookedness of their own soul.

"The path to the middle of the forest must be kept a secret," Xukun's grandfather had said, bouncing Xukun in his arms and poking his cheek softly. "Do you understand?"

Xukun was only six then, and he smiled brilliantly before clapping thrice in his grandfather's arms.

"I know," he had said then. "The best people live in the middle of the forest. We have to protect them!"

His grandfather eyes had wrinkled as he smiled at Xukun affectionately. "It is sacred land," he had said, before whispering to Xukun conspiratorially. "And deities live there, the ones that bless our village. You don't want to make them mad, do you?"

Xukun six-year-old eyes had gone wide with awe as he shook his head silently.

"Good," his grandfather said. "Remember that as a son of the Cai family, your words and thoughts have power. The forest will protect you, because you will in turn protect her."

  
——

  
Starting, Xukun realized that he had arrived at the middle of the forest without even realizing it. He sighed, resting his face on the bark of the tree. It had been so long, but it seemed pointless to deny why he was truly back. He had lingered in the forest before coming to the tree, scared to admit that he was waiting for the company of another, but it had been hours, and he felt so sentimental at the familiarity of the giant tree. Many memories had been made at this very tree, he thought nostalgically, and flushed a little when he thought of his more recent memories, and the last time he had leaned up against this bark, three years ago.

"Are you going to come over here or not?" He had asked, pretending to be annoyed. "It's my last day, you know."

A swell of fondness had curled up in his stomach when the other finally sprung forward to press him against the tree. He had leaned upwards to relish the warmth of the other before looping his arms around the other's neck and chasing his last taste of summer, of freedom, of youth. It had been so sweet on his tongue, dissolving like sugar from the front of his mouth to the very back of his teeth, and Xukun had thought, then, hesitantly, about the four-letter word they had both yet to say aloud.

Opening his eyes to ignore the burn on his cheeks, he turned his eyes upwards. He could almost feel the way the clouds would feel against his face from above.

He turned and began climbing the tree. It was physically trying, and many would have been tired after straddling even the first branch, but Xukun was used to the burn in his arms and legs. The corners of his lips turned upwards as he thought absentmindedly while scaling the tree about how the tree wasn't met to be climbed like this, from the bottom. Why climb when you have wings, or the ability to scurry up sideways against the bark like most of the creatures that made their homes here? But Xukun had persisted when he was younger, and he kept at it now, as the ground below became smaller and smaller as he rose higher and higher into the tree's branches.

A bead of sweat rolled down Xukun's neck. He caught it with his left palm, before swiping it on the back of his shirt. Slowly standing on the branch he was currently at, he walked near the edge to see the view. His breath caught as he saw the river beneath him, magnified over and over by the magic of the forest, its blue waves glittering in the late afternoon sun. It was mesmerizing, and he watched it sparkle for another minute before sitting down.

Xukun brushed his hair behind his left ear. For the second time today, he felt a little lost. He had waited one, two, three (and a half) hours before coming back to the place where he knew he would find the other. It had been years, yes, but he had waited out every day, every hour, every minute, every second, just like he knew the other had. Xukun, too, had felt the time stretching around him, gathering tension like a coiled rubber band waiting to snap. He had dreamed about the forest, vague, indistinct dreams where blurry shapes and a mess of colors wrapped themselves around him as a voice begged him to _put me down, I'm a god, Xukun! You can't embarrass me like this!_

All in all, he frowned, he had missed the other more fiercely and more intensely than he had ever felt. The longing was a permanent ache lodged in his chest cavity, towards the left, right over his heart.

...

Now that he was back,

Really,

Really back...

...

Shouldn't the other miss him too?

Xukun pouted, feeling more childish than he normally let himself be at almost-eighteen. He had been up in the branches, in the tree, where they almost met, for over twenty minutes. It wasn't nice to make him wait for so long, he thought. He wanted to be with the other, and he wanted it _now_. It had been over four hours since he stepped into the forest, so there was no way the other didn't know about Xukun's presence. Besides the fact that the forest's deity knew whenever anyone stepped into the forest, they were always so in-sync with each other that Xukun had once joked about their hearts beating to the same rhythm, before realizing what he had implied, trying to backtrack while furiously blushing as the other had burst out laughing, shoulders shaking as he hugged Xukun, but eyes suspiciously sparkling and wet.

But that didn't void Xukun's point, he thought. They were so in-tune with each other that he could feel each passing minute tugging on him like a physical pull. He must be close, Xukun thought moodily. Or else the separation wouldn't ache so badly, wouldn't catch on his heart, tighten his lungs and render him this breathless.

A gentle breeze ghosted across his cheeks, kissing them lightly with the faintest touch.

Well, if Xukun wasn't sure that someone else was with him, he certainly was now. He waited, breath catching on the idea of finally, finally...seeing him again.

After another minute of just silence and dead air, Xukun huffed, feeling petulant. If the forest's deity couldn't be bothered to show himself, Xukun thought, then he would just have to force him to come to him. Taking another glance at the river below him, he felt a current of doubt.

He wasn't reading things wrong, Xukun convince himself. He silently admitted to himself that the years away might have dulled his sense of perception. But there was no mistaking it. Someone was up here with him.

Swallowing, he gathered his courage.

His feet tensed as he felt the tension in the air. Then, with seven quick steps, he ran to the end of the branch, and jumped.

  
——

  
As he hurtled towards the river, Xukun wondered, faintly, if he had made a mistake.

  
——

  
The blue waves sure were looking a little close, he thought. Maybe it really was just a stray breeze that had been kicked up by another scurrying creature, or the cursory flap of wings as another landed on the branch. Xukun closed his eyes, resigning himself to the concrete-like impact of the water.

The sun was bright. Tears pricked at the corners of Xukun's eyes. He shut them decidedly. If he was going to be paralyzed from the fall, he thought, at least he wouldn't be blinded by the sun at the same time at the same time.

He could feel his own heartbeat rushing in his ears. One, two, three, four, five.

On the sixth, Xukun registered a shadow passing over his eyelids. A heavy weight pushed against his back, jolting Xukun upwards.

Xukun realized, slowly, that he no longer seemed to be falling. A hand touched his face, carefully, brushing away the tears gathered in eyes from the brightness of the sun, before settling on his lower back. The steadiness of these two hands filled Xukun with a glorious warmth, like he had drunken liquid gold, dizzying and almost terrifyingly sweet.

"You've got to stop jumping off of things," A voice said disapprovingly, next to his ear. Xukun could hear his frown. "One day I won't be there to catch you, and what then?"

Xukun opened his eyes, though he half felt as if he was fighting a losing battle against his eyelashes and more tears. He blinked twice, hard, refusing to cry.

There he was — Zhengting. His dark brown eyes were as beautiful as ever, intense and wonderful and so deep Xukun wanted to drown in them and never look away. His eyebrows were furrowed, expression clearly equally exasperated and worried and fond, and Xukun felt so much suddenly that he felt his heart twinge.

"Good thing you're stuck with me then," Xukun said, speaking past the lump in his throat. This was ridiculous. He wasn't — sad, for heaven's sake. There was no reason to get so emotional that Zhengting was holding him, that Zhengting's eyes were wide and bright and cautiously hopeful, that Zhengting's entire body was molded around Xukun so that it felt like they were no longer two, but one being, separated for a few years but joyfully reunited once more. No reason at all.

Zhengting grumbled but didn't reply, just held onto Xukun tighter as they floated gently down onto the riverbank. Once their feet touched the earth, Zhengting sprung upwards, pushing and prodding at Xukun and telling him to turn around to ensure that he was unharmed. Zhengting sighed after confirming that everything was alright.

"You're so silly," Zhengting said softly, running a hand through Xukun's soft hair. "Jumping off a tree to get my attention."

"Well it worked, didn't it?" Xukun replied airily. "You wouldn't have made a move any time soon. And I'd been here for four hours already."

"So silly," Zhengting smiled, repeating himself. He leaned in and pressed their foreheads together. "As if I don't already plan on staying with you forever."

Xukun could feel his cheeks reddening again, so he leaned in and pressed a feather-light kiss to the corner of Zhengting's mouth. He swallowed the words threatening to spill out of him, little three-word phrases that he wasn't sure he was ready for.

"Forever's a long time," he said instead. "Let's start with today."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ive hesitated for a while but decided to end it here ~ the future is wide open & u can imagine them in love however you'd like hehe

**Author's Note:**

> camellias are real and very pretty. i did google whether they were safe for cats to eat and the answer is yes! they're non-toxic. whew


End file.
